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The Intervention: If Not You, Then Who?

Could you imagine a strong and powerful leader attending a 12-step program for tough leadership and admitting, "Hey, I am a dominant leader, and I need help"?

I seriously doubt it. It’s tough to picture, isn’t it?

Those with strong personalities, known for their decisive and tough leadership, often struggle to step forward and recognize their need for personal development. Why is this?

These assertive leaders have crafted an image of strength and unwavering resolve, not just for themselves but as an example for their teams.

While effective in earning respect and results, this facade can make it incredibly hard for them to admit imperfections.

From personal experience, I've found myself resistant when feedback is delivered without care but much more receptive when it comes from someone who has built trust with me.

Effective Approaches for Engaging Dominant Leaders

Imagine being in their shoes. As strong as they might appear, no one enjoys hearing they have shortcomings.

Yet, a straightforward and assertive tone from a trusted individual could make all the difference. Here’s how to talk to them:

  • Start Softly: Mention observations like, "I’ve noticed some people seem a bit uncomfortable around you." Use this as a way to ask reflective questions like, "How might your tone affect your team? How do you think they perceive you?"

  • Highlight Strengths and Opportunities: Praise their ability to drive projects forward and inquire, "What could be holding you back from achieving even greater results?" Discuss the benefits of adapting their style.

  • Focus on Impact: Bring up feedback constructively. For example, "Given the feedback, what changes could enhance your results?" Highlight how refining their approach could amplify their impact.

  • Provide Supportive Feedback: Stay neutral and supportive. Say, "Hey, I've heard from the tech team that your communication style can be somewhat intimidating. I’ve noticed it too and thought it was important to discuss because I know you care deeply about supporting the team and ensuring successful project outcomes."

By focusing on improvement rather than criticism, you align with their intrinsic motivation to excel and lead effectively.

It’s about guiding them to an understanding, not dictating what they should do. That way, it won’t be perceived as confrontation but rather as uncovering growth opportunities.

Speak Up, They'll Appreciate It

Lastly, if you find it intimidating to approach a dominant leader directly, seeking support from HR or higher-ups can be a practical step. 

Just don't stay silent.

The repercussions of unchecked alpha behavior can significantly affect team morale, jeopardize their positions, and be costly.

Speak up and bring an alpha leader's unhealthy behavior to light. They'll appreciate it. 

You could even become that trusted ally they take under their wing, pushing you to a higher role and responsibility.

After all, if you can help an alpha leader see things differently, you’re demonstrating your own leadership and influence.



If you're that too strong and decisive leader reading this, why not take the lead in your development? Initiate a feedback process; ask your team directly about how you can improve. This small step shows your willingness to grow and sets a powerful example for your team.

PPS: Download my FREE guide, "7 Key Insights - The Untapped Power of the Alpha Leader," where I cover this topic and offer practical strategies you can implement immediately.



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