Don't die with the music still in you
I was listening to the Five Lessons To Live By Today, from Wayne Dyer, and realized how much they apply to what is happening currently.
I thought I'd put them into perspective and hope they will resonate with you just as well.
His first one is: When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.
I love his story about a man who lost his keys.
The power is out in his house, and it is complete darkness. He opens the front door and sees the lamppost lighting up the corner of his street. So, he assumes that it should be easier to go out and search for his keys around the lamppost.
Then his neighbor shows up and inquires about what he is searching for?
“My keys,” he says. And so, the neighbor decides to help.
After a short while, the neighbor asks, "Where exactly did you lose your keys?"
And the man answers: "In my living room."
“What?” His neighbor said. "That doesn't make any sense."
And the man answered: "Well, it doesn't make any sense for me to grope around looking for my keys in the dark inside the house when the light is out here."
Crazy, isn't it? But that is what we do when we start to look for solutions to our emotional problems outside of ourselves.
When we try to appease our fears by seeking relief externally, by chasing another project, going on a shopping spree, blaming others, or, I've got to say it, hoarding toilet paper and acting selfishly instead of empathizing with each other.
That's what we do when we seek comfort in yet another relationship or quit our job without closure. When we don't look at how we contributed to our downfall, at what is causing our poor behavior, or what makes us feel broken. This is what happens when we don't try to understand why we failed, and when we don't realize what makes us feel whole.
Or when we lean on others, like fragile pillars depending on surrounding columns to hold us up, and if one of these columns moves or changes position, then we hopelessly crumble to the ground.
To live a healthy emotional life and for you to feel whole, you need to take a good look inside yourself and stop depending on external points. When you do that, if things change around you, you will be able to respond in a balanced and controlled way, not fall into panic or despair.
Instead, you will be able to realize what is important to you and the world we live in, reframing your perspective to create positive change within and around yourself.
His second one: There are no justified resentments.
His point here is about how much resentment we carry inside from things that have affected our lives: the abusive boss, the wrong relationship, the person who did not say thank you, the one who still owes you money.
How much we allow these things to dwell in us is telling of how much resentment we hold.
Today, it might be resentment from what this pandemic has created. We could hold resentment because people got sick and died, resentment from watching the caregivers and service people exhausted. Resentment because we cannot spend time with our loved ones, for our lack of mobility and social interactions or lack of income. The list is long, and many of these are entirely justified.
However, as Wayne Dyer says, dwelling on resentment will only harm us and create a sense of despair.