Last week, I was hiking the hills near my home. The wind picked up as I climbed, rushing softly around me. I stopped, closed my eyes, and exhaled. For a moment, it felt as if the world itself was speaking to me: "You are okay. You are not alone. Everything is okay."
It had been a long, challenging week. I was facilitating a workshop for a team at a tech startup. Brilliant minds, driven individuals. When I asked them what gets in the way of their best work, the room fell silent. Eventually, someone spoke up:
“Honestly? I sometimes feel like I’m just going through the motions. Like I’m not really connected to my team or even to myself, and there is much chaos and need to perform.”
Heads around the room nodded.
We talked about how disconnection shows up in subtle ways: the hesitation to ask for help, the unspoken frustrations, the reluctance to admit when we’re struggling.
One team member shared how anxious she’d been feeling lately—about deadlines, implementations, and things outside her control. Others nodded, admitting they often carried that anxiety into meetings, where it sat like an invisible barrier between them and their colleagues.
I told them about a practice that has helped me during my own difficult times—moments of deep struggle that left me feeling anxious, disconnected, and alone, times when I felt like I was carrying more than I could handle.
I would go on walks, and then I would do something simple yet grounding: I stopped, kneeled, and placed my hand on the ground.
I reminded myself of something simple yet powerful: Right this moment, everything is okay, and I’m okay.
Anxiety would pull me into the past or the future, I told them, but “in that present moment, I didn’t need answers to all my worries. I just needed to be here. Now. To trust that things will turn out okay. To know that I’m not alone.”
The room was quiet. Then, one of the participants said, “I’ve never thought about just stopping like that. We’re all so busy looking ahead that we forget to check in with ourselves.”
It struck a chord.
Have you ever felt that way? Absorbed in what’s next, you lose sight of what’s now?
We’re often so focused on the next goal, the next challenge, or worry about a past issue that we forget to pause and ground ourselves. But it’s not just about what we accomplish—it’s about how we connect—with our teams and ourselves.
The wind that morning on the hill reminded me of something we often neglect: Tenderness is not weakness. It’s strength. Leaders who show their humanity—who create space for honest conversations, for connection, for presence—are the ones who inspire trust and loyalty.
What would it look like to pause and connect, even when you’re leading?
Pause before a conversation: Take 30 seconds to center yourself before a meeting or discussion. Ask, "How can I truly listen and see the person before me?"
Acknowledge emotions in the room: Name them with compassion if tensions or anxieties are present. For example, “I know we’re all under a lot of pressure right now. I sense how this can affect you.”
Give feedback with intention: Whether it’s encouragement or constructive feedback, give it with presence and care. Let the other person feel seen. That’s the human touch.
Bring humanity into your meetings: Ask a simple question like, “How are you REALLY doing today?” and wait in silence for an answer.
Ground yourself: Don’t forget about your needs. Pause, go on walks, touch a tree, breathe, and remind yourself: “Right now, I’m okay.”
Reflection Challenge:
This week, and as we approach the holidays, try practicing just one of these techniques. Journal your experiences:
• What shifts did you notice?
• What challenges arose?
• How did others respond to your presence?
My wish for you is not perfection but presence. May you find the courage to be tender—with yourself and those around you.
Remember that the light you’re searching for outside already exists within you. Shine that light to create deeper connections, greater trust, and brighter paths for others.
Until next time 👋🏼
Love 💙 Roberto
PS: If this resonates with you, let me know. I’d love to hear how you bring presence into your life and leadership.
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